Donald Trump

2026 Valentines

This entry was posted in comics and tagged Donald Trump incels Jeffrey Epstein John Roberts Mike Johnson Pam Bondi RFK Jr. on by
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Like STIs on his island, more Epstein files are slowly leaking out and spreading everywhere. Pam Bondi’s redactions are sloppy, arbitrary, and leave a Donald-Trump-shaped hole in what they omit.

RFK Jr.’s Measles Marathon continues to break records across the country, Mike Johnson’s fine with a few essential amendments getting ignored to speed up DHS’s pogroms, and John Roberts had his flunkies sign NDAs as soon as Trump won, which is something a totally respectable branch of government does.

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Trump Trophies

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Mad King Donald has been threatening Greenland, NATO, and anyone else he can find on a map because he didn’t get the Nobel Peace Prize. This is a very demented old man and would be 25th Amendment-ed out of there in his first term if the toadies in his cabinet weren’t also the country’s most craven monsters.

Congress’s excuse for doing nothing is that they’re on board with all this garbage too. Even Democrats aren’t talking much about impeachment, not even for the rogues gallery of freaks in the cabinet. So all that’s left for those of us without any power is to hope for whatever’s going on in his hand to spread to the rest of his body.

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Project 2026

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What a year this week has been, huh? I was mostly done with this cartoon when ICE agent Jonathan Ross murdered Renee Good in Minneapolis, so I shoehorned an oblique reference to it in Rubio’s comments. The only surprising thing is that it took this long for these untrained goons to kill someone the media couldn’t ignore.

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Incredible Global News 2025

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Some goofs and gags to close out the year (or until next week when I draw something else).

The last panel is inspired by the alt-text I wrote for this Bluesky post. Larry’s failson is destroying CBS and Paramount by installing people even dumber than him, I assume. After this was already inked, Bari Weiss killed a 60 Minutes piece about our CECOT concentration camp in El Salvador. I’m sure she’ll fail up even further and get appointed to Captain on Strange New Worlds.

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Leaked MRIs

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They’re trucking Trump up to the National Zoo every other week to put him in the large animal MRI, and the official line is that he’s in perfect health with a good brain. Whatever it really is, it needs to hurry up and be extremely painful. Hopefully it happens over the holiday break so we can all celebrate as a nation.

I’ve referenced the movie Innerspace before and like everything Joe Dante made in the ’80s it was extremely influential to me. Gremlins 3 might finally be happening, but Chris Columbus is attached to direct, which seems specifically designed to infuriate nerds like me. I know everyone’s watching Home Alone this time of year, but that guy’s not good!

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Recession Recipes

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How is it a week before Thanksgiving already? The holidays are always a mess of early deadlines to accommodate publications that have staff who get time off, unlike myself. This happens predictably every year, so naturally I’m scrambling at the last minute once again to get things out before everyone hunkers down while we wait to see what horrors 2025 still has in store for us before it’s 2026’s turn to kick our ass.

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