Donald Trump

Insurrectionist Slush Fund Sweepstakes

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(panel 1 - Title on a novelty check held by Trump.) Insurrectionist Slush Fund Sweepstakes Trump, "Every LOSER is a WINNER!"
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Acting Attorney General Todd Blanche put together quite the sweetheart deal for every January 6th C.H.U.D. and set aside nearly $2 billion to compensate them for the pain of facing mild consequences after attempting to overthrow the government. Also in this blatantly corrupt deal was blanket immunity for Trump, and anyone he’s related to, for financial crimes, and probably every other type of crime as well. (I’m not reading all of it.)

This entire century has been ruined by people favoring “looking forward” rather than make anyone responsible of its horrors face a single consequence, and things keep ratcheting for the worse every time. At least Jay Johnston gets a fat check after his Bob’s Burgers ones ran out.

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White House Correspondents’ Dinner Menu

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The White House Correspondents’ Dinner is still happening next weekend, despite Trump constantly wiping his doo-doo ass with the First Amendment, threatening to jail real journalists, and in some cases having his goons actually follow through. The preening bozos who will be attending and hosting this thing are more gossip columnists and state propagandists than the journalists Trump is targeting, and none of them are even good at the job like Leni Riefenstahl.

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Fast Feud

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This is an exclusive for $5+ monthly patrons. Reader support is essential and I’m beefing up my Patreon output to reflect that. Not just for the $5+ tier, either. For only $1 a month, you can see my weekly cartoons before anyone else, as well as posts and livestreams that I don’t make available anywhere else.

And if you’re already a subscriber, THANK YOU!

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Congressional Crisis Kit

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The week started with the President threatening to annihilate Iran in a deranged post on his vanity website. That didn’t happen, which is a pleasant surprise! Despite claims of a ceasefire, we’re exactly where we’ve been for over a month now: Lots of people are dead in Iran and lots of boats are stuck in the Strait of Hormuz.

While we were all contemplating our mortality Tuesday, Congress was away on vacation, doing nothing to exercise any constraints on this madman. Of course Republicans are largely to blame, but Democrats also overwhelmingly approved of this stupid war in a retroactive vote that occurred after the bombs were already falling on schools and hospitals.

The plan since January 2025 was to give Trump enough rope to hang himself in the midterms. That’s a lot of rope, and a lot of people are being hanged while we wait for them to actually be seated.

While in the minority, they could gum up this idiot fascist machine by refusing to fund it, or confirm Trump’s unqualified and dangerous flunky nominees. I know this is possible because I remember Mitch McConnell. He practically single-handedly ruined the last quarter century by wielding every bit of power available to the Senate minority.

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Exit Strategies

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After starting a war without a plan, the United States may be about to end it without one, while leaving Iran with more leverage that it had before it began now that it’s collecting tolls from ships passing through the Strait of Hormuz. The administration’s attempts to spin this as a victory aren’t landing with the MAGA crowd, who usually will eat whatever Trump serves them, but apparently even they have a limit and it’s $4+ gas.

Thousands of innocents killed, billions wasted, and turning the United States into a pariah state all because a sundowning pedophile got bored and thought some explosions would liven up his TV time. Now he’s bored again, and we all have to sit helplessly and wait for him to pick his next target. Unless you’re in Congress. There’s a lot of things you could be doing to put an end to this, but none of them read my comics.

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Bored of Peace Games

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Our dumb war with Iran is still going on for reasons that become even more unclear as the weeks drag on. Even the selfish dummies who voted this guy in are starting to turn on him because their SUV juice is getting expensive. Unfortunately for us, and the rest of the world, Congress is dumber than that and agreed to fund this disaster to avoid being accused of not “supporting the troops.”

There wasn’t an entrance strategy, so there’s no hope for an exit strategy. One fuck-up after another until even our allies have to rethink their grand plan to do nothing and wait for the guy to die. Which, to be fair, is also the Democrats’ plan.

Not much funny to say about any of this, so I drew some poops and made fun of Marco Rubio’s big-ass shoes. We all cope with the horrors of war in our own ways.

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Stickers Shock

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Trump’s adventure in Iran is predictably leading to soaring oil and gas prices, something that was very important for the media right up until Election Day in 2024. “I Did That!” stickers blaming Biden for inflation were all the rage, so I figured I’d take a shot at elevating the genre for this regime.

I might actually make these if there’s enough interest to cover production costs up front. But until then, I can tweak a few of the designs for My Threadless Shop, which needs some more designs to take advantage of the $13 t-shirt sale that’s currently going on. Let me know if there’s any you’d like to see!

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Dumb War Weapons

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We launched another preemptive war of aggression that’s going to kill a lot of people and ruin even more lives for decades to come. At least Congress, including 157 House Democrats, retroactively signed off on it, ensuring this boondoggle is adequately funded while the rest of our lives aren’t.

With Iraq, there was a pretense of manufacturing consent, and public opinion supported it until the fact that it was a stupid war of choice became too obvious to ignore. Besides Congress and the media, nobody wants this war with Iran, and since planning is for nerds, the consequences are already extremely unpopular.

We all just have to sit and watch, and hope the blowback doesn’t happen to us personally, since the ostensible opposition party’s plan is to wait for us to bail them out in the midterms. So much damage is going to happen between now and then. And it all might’ve been prevented if Biden and Merrick Garland released any of the freaky Epstein details that have been trickling out over the past year when they could’ve influenced an election.

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