Republicans


Beware of the Speaker   Recently updated !

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As soon as Republicans squeaked out control of the House last November, I did a bunch of cartoons predicting this debt ceiling mess and ways to avoid it. Instead, the White House was high on their own supply and believed Republicans would magically become rational and not do the thing they campaigned on doing.

The solutions have been out there, being shouted by nobodies like myself, and “serious” people since the first time this happened during the Obama Administration. But arguments for the Trillion Dollar Coin and 14th Amendment hold little sway in a White House still enamored with the opinions of centrist toilet men.

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House Programming Guide

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This Congress is barely a month old and already beyond parody. I suppose I’ll continue mocking them until the last checks on their power are gone and our country completes its final spin down the toilet bowl.

I didn’t watch the State of the Union, since that’s always old news by the end of the week it happens. All the genius pundits say it’s the unofficial start of the 2024 campaign, so say goodbye to any meaningful legislation getting passed through this bunch.

I watched The Menu instead. Highly recommended and not just because of the shoutout to my hometown of Brockton, MA.

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Janet Yellen’s Weird Tricks to Get Out of Debt

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We did this already.

Republicans will use the debt ceiling to hold the global economy hostage whenever they can because Democrats let them. If we weren’t so used to this charade, it would sound sillier than a Trillion Dollar Coin or flat out ignoring the ceiling because it’s unconstitutional under the 4th clause of the 14th Amendment.

This crop of House Republicans is even more deranged than the last time we did this default brinkmanship, so get ready to barter for those eggs you can’t afford if you aren’t already.

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Speaker of the House Alternates

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There might be a Speaker of the House before anyone sees this, but not as of this posting. It is a pleasant change of pace to see “Republicans in disarray” be the media narrative of the week.

However, if the Democrats expelled and banned the Treason Caucus when they had the chamber and popular support following the coup, we wouldn’t be in this situation. At least they are (so far) not listening to idiot centrists’ calls for them to help the Republicans out of their own mess.

Six Republicans could end this by siding with the Dems, but governing isn’t really among any of their priorities. It’s all spectacle and obstruction to win the next election, so I guess we’re all screwed.

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Swing Voters Explain Themselves

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The midterms are rapidly approaching and the polls between “fascists” and “milquetoast not-fascists” are closer than they should be. The mainstream press loves a horserace, even when the consequences are life and death for millions of people. Gaffes are easier to report (and draw) than all the mechanisms Republicans are going to use to end what little democracy we have left if given control of Congress once more.

But get your “I Voted.” sticker anyway. These idiots will.

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GOP Midterm Messaging

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You don’t roll out a new advertising campaign until after Labor Day. With the midterms coming up, the GOP is in need of a new one. They’re currently polling lower than Democrats, which is surprising if you have the same view of Democratic leadership as I do.

This could all change in two months, but for now, it’s nice to see them ineptly flailing about for once.

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Matt Gaetz’s Impeachment Stall Tactics

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This failson makes Trey Gowdy look like a dignified statesman. If you’re old enough to remember the Brooks Brothers Riot, you know we’re in for a very bad time. And somehow Dick Cheney is still alive for this one, too. No silver linings.

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