Monthly Archives: May 2025


ICE-Mart

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A few years ago, I did a comic called Police-Mart. Now that ICE and the rest of the DHS goon squads are sporting new January 6th-inspired uniforms, I figured it would be a good time to revisit the bit for their new unaccountable and sloppy looks.

Masked goons have been snatching people off the street to meet Stephen Miller’s quotas, and it’s not just happening in red states and rural areas. Many safely blue governors and mayors are not only ignoring it, they’re actively helping to appear “tough on immigration.”

I drew Gavin Newsom because he’s the slimiest and most well-known of these Democratic governors, but I could’ve included Massachusetts’ own Governor Healey, who’s been waiting on “more details” even as her constituents have been targeted since inauguration day.

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Massachusetts Flag Redesigns

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Massachusetts’ flag and seal are problematic, so every once in a while the state legislature pretends to do something about it. There is currently a public call for submissions, and while I don’t think I have any actual shot at winning, I figured it was a fun prompt for some jokes that aren’t about our country’s slide into fascism.

With the state and its cities being majority Democratic, Republicans frequently switch parties to actually have a shot at winning in general elections. Bob Kraft’s nepobaby Josh recently did this, and moved from neighboring Brookline, to challenge Mayor Wu, who is as good a mayor as I’ve ever seen. Kraft moved to Boston so hastily, he doesn’t even know what ward he lives in, something that everyone who votes regularly in Boston knows by heart.

If you’re not familiar with The Modern Lovers’ debut album, that’s what the seemingly random “Massachusetts Forever” panel is referencing. Jonathan Richman’s birthday was this week, so I’ve been listening to that album even more than usual.

I know it’s been five years, but yeah, I’m still salty about the Mookie Betts trade. The Bruins also traded longtime player and captain Brad Marchand earlier this year, and while he’s a a fan favorite, myself included, he’s on the backend of his career, not his prime like Betts.

As a native of Plymouth County, the pilgrims are synonymous with boring field trips and terrifying wax museums. Fuck them genocidaires and their buckle hats.

I’ve gotten a few comments that some of these should be t-shirts, so I did a soft launch of a store over on Threadless. I’ll be adding designs from comics in the future and promoting it more heavily once there’s a decent library.

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Spring Reads

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There are still residents, including citizens, getting exiled (deported ain’t the right word), but Hakeem Jeffries and Democratic leadership have decided that members of Congress visiting them in gulags to highlight their plight is a distraction from the important work of their latest stunt. Impeachment and obstruction are also considered “distractions” so the Democrats’ message is clear: We’re on our own, until the fundraising texts begin again.

David Zaslav makes $50+ million a year to make decisions that everyone knows are dumber than dogshit. Dude is very lucky Luigi Mangione wasn’t a superfan of any of the shows he abruptly cancelled.

AG Sulzberger recently published some self-indulgent op-ed about preserving democracy and press freedoms that are under attack, presumably while wearing Tim Robinson’s hot dog outfit from I Think You Should Leave. This “Just-Asking-Questions” nepo-baby’s paper recently did a glow-up profile of Curtis “Moldbug” Yarvin, an internet forum crank and white supremacist from the early aughts who has somehow captured the imaginations of the racist dullards who are ruining everything.

I’d recommend an actual good book here, but I’ve been self-soothing by reading the dumbest pulp sci-fi books on my nightstand lately. So unless you’re a teen reading this in the late ’60s or ’70s I don’t think they’d be your thing.

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Trump’s Tariff Rations

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The container ships have slowed to a crawl (not because of something funny like the one that got stuck in the Suez Canal), and soon shelves will be empty. Many people predicted this would happen the night of the election. Unfortunately all of them were at home pulling their hair out while people on TV were chattering about all the other misery they’d soon be gleefully covering.

I was a kid in the ’80s when there were jokes and whole sitcom episodes about the empty shelves in the Soviet Union and its satellites. Now we’ll be the ones smuggling blue jeans and records printed on old x-rays.

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Unfocused Groups

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Ever since the 2016 election, the New York Times has been doing Trump Voter Safaris for their ostensibly liberal audience to either gawk at or empathize with. They are a sideshow from the people with real power. And now they’re being moderated by Frank Luntz, which is especially gross for any of us old enough to remember his role in shaping Republican messaging in the early aughts.

Scrutinizing Trump’s supporters individually is a waste of time while authoritarianism runs amok and time runs out to stop it. But those daffy bastards sure are fun to goof on online.

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