comics


America’s Assignment Editor

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The NYTimes was never the bastion of the liberal media people claim it is, but it’s definitely taken a hard right turn since nepo baby AG Sulzberger took over the family business. He oversaw James Bennett becoming opinion editor, who let Bari Weiss and Tom Cotton run insane 4chan shit for a couple years before the normal employees put up enough of a stink to run him out. (With a few notable exceptions, the opinion section still sucks shit though.)

The rightward tilt of the “straight” news side were always there, with the Iraq War propaganda being the most blatant in my lifetime. But Trump has sent them over the deep end; either to appear neutral with both-sides bullshit, or actively targeting a minority to signal their willingness to work with fascists.

None of this will save them if they succeed in getting the second Trump term they want so bad. He hates their fancy high society guts and will send them to the camps with the rest of us.

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New Tech Trends

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Apple started selling their dumb goggles this week, so we’re being subjected to another round of hype trying to sell this garbage. Every “big idea” Silicon Valley’s tried to sell over the last decade or two has either been outright fraud (self-driving cars, Theranos, crypto, etc.) or just re-inventing something that already exists, but with middle-men to extract money from users and the people doing the real work (gig economy, rideshare, streaming, etc.).

I swear I’ll get off my “Capitalism Bad” kick next week.

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2024 Valentines

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Fake valentines are an (almost) annual tradition since I first started drawing weekly cartoons over 22 years ago. The little cut-out dots and scissors are vestigial artifacts from when my comics regularly appeared on paper products called “alt-weeklies.”

While there’s apparently a lot of decent economic news these days, things are pretty grim for tech and especially media jobs. Execs are either hollowing out their staffs to boost dividends, or simply getting bored with their media toys and moving on to the next big grift.

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Influencers to Avoid

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I’m old and don’t regularly use the same social media that the kids do. I only glean bits and pieces that bleed over to the older, nerdier enclaves of Bluesky and Mastodon, or when YouTube’s terrible algorithm tries to push garbage on me while I’m watching old clips of Max Headroom.

The Non-Fungible-Tumbler refers to the current Stanley Cup fad, which I only heard about recently from a million hacky hockey jokes. Apparently grown-ass adults are collecting these things as status symbols like they’re Starter jackets in the ’90s. At least they exist, unlike NFTs.

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Rejected Courtroom Sketches

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Trump’s been pulling a bunch of shenanigans in court that would have any other defendant in jail for contempt of court months ago. No judge wants to be the one to do the very obvious thing and apply consequences to this demented fascist for the first time in his life, because that’ll set a dangerous precedent that all ex-presidents are subject to laws.

With most of Trump’s trials not allowing video, or even cameras, courtroom sketch artists are having a moment. It’s a job that I thought I could do. They’re presumably employed by the court, with wages and benefits, and they don’t even have to do speech bubbles! Stenographers do that. How hard could it be?

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Boeing’s Blueprints for Success

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Almost five years after Boeing’s cost-cutting grounded 737 Maxes, a plugged door failed on one on its way out of Portland. They nearly avoided charges for the first round of negligence, but this latest incident reset the clock.

These disasters, or near-disasters, happen because passengers aren’t Boeing’s or the airlines’ customers. Their shareholders are. It’s the same reason why only masochists fly Southwest. Extracting profit from us rubes to churn out dividends or worsening the product to claim write-offs isn’t unique to aviation; it’s a symptom of late-stage capitalism.

Can’t think of a clever segue to carbon offsets, so I’ll just say they’re a scam. Unless investments in true transit alternatives are made, our reliance on air travel remains bad news for the climate. No one, not even me, a bike-riding transit pinko, would opt to take Amtrak instead of a plane to anywhere further from Boston than DC. And that’s before even taking costs into consideration.

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2024 Congressional Schedule

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The new year has begun and so has the countdown to 24/7 election talk. Not here, though. Getting it out early while we’re all shaking off holiday hangovers and/or the latest covid surge.

I won’t keep harping on Mike Johnson and Republicans actively wanting to do a coup, that’s a well-known fact. But Schumer (and Biden) have wasted the past three years on the mixed-messaging of praising bipartisanship and working with Republicans while simultaneously claiming they’re an imminent threat to democracy. Gotta sharpen up the contrasts for the low-information dum-dums who have all our fates in their simple, fickle hands.

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Republican Primaries’ Cryptid Candidates

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Like I wrote last week, I’m only aware of the 2024 also-rans due to my proximity to New Hampshire. They have some real freaks, but you-know-who’s going to be the nominee. More states should follow Colorado and Maine’s lead and kick him off the ballot, but the Supreme Court is packed with coup-lovin’ shitheads, so I’m not hopeful.

Unlike the Republican freak-of-the-week, I could draw cryptids forever. I only saw a moose once, so I count it as a cryptid. If that’s not satisfying, pretend I drew the aliens that “abducted” Betty and Barney Hill for New Hampshire instead.

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