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President Trump won’t throw out the first pitch at the Nationals’ home opener. The White House claims there’s a scheduling conflict, but we all know it’s to avoid an embarrassing thunder of boos.

It’s tempting to assume our doughy, old, and large-assed president can’t throw a pitch over the plate, but he apparently did that at a Jimmy Fund fundraiser at my beloved Fenway Park. But he looked like a goon doing it.

Whether he actually donated anything to the Jimmy Fund is up to David Farenthold to find out.

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